Thursday, November 12, 2009

*the apocalypse*


"every starting will eventually comes to the ending"

Untuk ak pepatah ni ade btolnye..
coz it happens to me recently.
I was a delightful and my days were full of chocolate moments after Ive met this one person. haha. It felt like I was pull again to the ray of light after ive been awhile in the dark n alone..
but it was so yesterday..
Im not feeling anything like it recently..
yup im back to those dark days again..

We were juz fren.. and nuttin more than dat. impossible to have any kind of special relationship.
but still this person has made my days..
everything has changed now..
I dunno why.. We used to have a meaningful and nice conversation..
but now we only speak like barbarians..vulgar n annoying..
stupid and gross jokes will be the only idea to make us laugh..
huh..

we were not updating with each others anymore juz recently..

texting? haha. we used to text each other everyday evetho there's nutting much to say.. care to one another.. "tgh buat pe? dh mkn?"
but now we will only text if there are important things.
sometimes not at all in a week.. huh.
ak pon xtau kenape jd camtu..
kalo ak text takot nnt die xreply..
tp ak mmg nk text die slalu sbnrnye..

calling? apetah lg.. ive started to try not to call this person.. after being told directly by receiver not in mood to take my call..ive asked y? but being reply there is just no reason..and the best part is this person was laughing telling me that it is enjoyable to let my call hasnt been taken on the next day we were meeting.. wutafuck was dat?
i really need to talk to sum1 kot at dat moments..urghh.
tp xpelah its okay.. it is hard to predict someone's character.

it is really hurt that this person doesnt understand the word appreciation..
appreciation towards time..i will always try to find free time to spend together.
but sumtime it was wasted because this person's priority will always go to the phone whenever we were together.. huh.. it is painful to see this person was busy texting and receiving call for quite sumtime whenever i was there..hello.im still here with u and few other frens kot..
probably i was jealous? may be.. haha. i dunno.
Ive put an effort to see u kot. but u juz blew it off.. quite often. if u only know how to appreciate..adoiyai.

BUT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS I DONT BLAME THIS PERSON TOTALLY. I DID WRONGFUL BEHAVIOR 2. WE ARE JUZ HUMAN. MAKE MISTAKES AND STILL LEARNING.



tp ape2 pon ak syg kot towards this person.
not cinta..haha. i dunno. but mmg syg sgt sbg kawan..
uve made my days. i juz hope a little appreciation frm u..
hopefully everything will be back juz like when we first started to know each other..

we never know what will happens next.

xoxo
-cyfulnizam-

Saturday, November 7, 2009

russian roulette




Take a breath, take it deep
Calm yourself, he says to me
If you play, you play for keeps
Take a gun, and count to three
I’m sweating now, moving slow
No time to think, my turn to go

And you can see my heart beating
You can see it through my chest
And I’m terrified but I’m not leaving
Know that I must pass this test
So just pull the trigger

Say a prayer to yourself
He says, close you eyes
Sometimes it helps
And then I get a scary thought
That he’s here means he’s never lost

And you can see my heart beating
You can see it through my chest
And I’m terrified but I’m not leaving
Know that I must pass this test
So just pull the trigger

As my life flashes before my eyes
I’m wondering will I ever see another sunrise?
So many won’t get the chance to say goodbye
But it’s too late to think of the value of my life

And you can see my heart beating
You can see it through my chest
And I’m terrified but I’m not leaving
Know that I must pass this test x2
So just pull the trigger


yup mmg lirik ni menusuk.. skrg mood tetibe cam nk dgr lagu ni.. beat rhythm, melody but especially lyric ngn title mmg XTRA D-A-R-K.. huh.
mmg dpt express ape yg ak rase skrg..
huh.

be patient cyful.
u can get thru this.

yeah i will

xoxo
-cyfulnizam-

B*D-A-Y-A-N-A




To this sweet and luvly gurl,
Happy 22nd Birthday Yana cayunk!!!
sayang kau!!! muahxx muahxxx!!!

may our friendship will last!!! =)

xoxo
-cyfulnizam-

crite di sebalik KONVO SIDANG KE-13

hy again!
setiap kali post baru ak je mesti dh dekat sebulan ak tak tulis..
so ak rase pembace pon dh cam xde..
ye ar x hapdate.. huhu.
xpelah.. tulis ni pon sekadar nk bitau ape yg terbuku dlm hati..

today our topic is konvo.
huhu.

konvo ak dh beberape minggu lps gak la.
it was on 24 Oct kot.. rasenyela..
tp xpela blom basi lagi kot nk citer.. hehe.


21 oct 2009
>>>>>>>>>>>calling syikin soya (kuboo) name manje die

me: hello ku boo kau kat dungun lg ke?
kuboo: urghhh syikin dlm toilet laa..(kwn die)
me: xpe la ckp kat die ku dout (name yg die pggl ak) kol k.. suoh die kol blk.
kuboo>>>>>>>>>>>>calling
kuboo: kudout!!!
me: kuboo!!! hahaha. kau kat dungun lg ke? ble nk dtg cni?
kuboo: esk ak blk ak amik kau tros kat umah k? kau blk keje kol brape?
me: ak blk kol 5.15 camtu..
kuboo: elok lah tu ak pon dr dungun ni amik kau kte tros gerak bangi k.
me: orite kuboo kte jumpe yg laen2 sume kat sane esk..bye kuboo
kuboo: bye kudout!

22 oct 2009

esk nye ak blk keje tros siap nk pegi bangi coz nk jumpe yg laen2 kat sane..
yela rindu gle babai kot kat sane.. zaman kegemilangan kat sane.. haha.
so kuboo pon amik ak pas ak abis keje tros gerak sane coz xnk buang mase..
sampai je kat seksyen 8 kat sane.. kuar kete ternampak la minah muke slambe tp ngn kete kelisa n xlupe laki kat sblh minah tu pon cam kenal..

me: BAI!!!
nana: KUDOUT!!! (dlm kete lg kot minah ni)
me: KUANANG!!!
anang: senyum geleng kpale je tgk ak menjerit kat tpt parking..
me: bai..anang rindu gle kat korg..lame kot xjumpe..(airmate kuar sket..ye ar rindu kot kat besties ak ni)
anang: dh2 meh cni.. ni dh jumpe dh ni..
nana: dout lame xjumpe..kte pg amik add plak
me: ye ar tu.. lame xjumpe die en

pas babak melalak melolong pg amik add.. sorg lg geng ktorg.. jumpe je add sambung blk babak melalak ni.. adoi..haha.
then tros gi cr tpt makan coz dh lapar gle..
chit chat la masing2 punye life selepas 6 bulan abis blaja..
ak la kene serang dlu coz diorg nk tau sgt best ke keje?
ak ckp BULLSHIT keje! haha.
mmg xbest kot..blaja kat bangi dlu lg best kot ngn korg..hahahah
sume pon stuju coz ble berpisah mmg laen..mmg xbest cam dlu..
yela ak stuju ngn kate2 "setiap pertemuan mesti ade perpisahan"
then sambung borak2 kat andalus.. xbleh blah.. da la ak dr kl ke bangi pastu ke kl blk..hoho. jalan sakan.

23 oct 2009

arini ktorg decide nk gi amik jubah same2..
the prob is ak xbwk bende2 yg kene print sume.. terbaik..
syikin ckp nk bertolak 7 pg.. tp hampeyh ak da bgn awal kot..
last2 pegi kol 9 pg.. ye ar ak tdo pon pukol 5pg cam2..
so sume keletihan ngn ak buat hal lg..
sampai je kat uitm shah alam sume pening nk gi area mane..
satu hal lg.. mmg sesat gak ar dlm tu..
last2 pg kat menara.. mmg amik jubah kat sane..
so ak decide nk gi makan dlu coz sume dh lapar..
sian nana coz jadual makan die xbleh lari..kalo lari je nt gastrik
drpd ak beratur panjang2 pon baik ak gi makan dlu..puas hati..
dlm pukol 12 baru amik jubah.. then grak smayang jumaat..

>>>>>>>texting syikin
me: korg pas amik jubah ngn smayang jumaat nk gi mane?
kuboo: ikot korg la
me: kte gi the curve je la. dekat sket.
kuboo: xde hal

sampai je kat sane sume muke dh toya.. keletihan..
anang blk futsal pukol 3pg camtu.. ak abis lepak pon ngn diorg smlm pon kol 3pg gak..
yg larat nk jln2 syikin je..ye ar coz die nk shopping..die ckp kat Dungun xde jenama branded nk shopping so okaylah teman kan die..
anang ngn nana kene blk plak coz ade hal..
ak plak...adoiyai korg dh la lame xjumpe dh nk blk dh.. so xpela.. nk buat camane..
nt jumpe lg..ak pon blk umah tros tdo.. ngn xtukar baju ngn suar..tros terlantar..

24 Oct 2009

5.00 am
ak tetibe terjage awal2 pagi.. nk bangun je tgn kanan ak saket gle babi.. mmg xbleh gerak.. ak dh cube angkat mmg susah nk gerak.. ak tersedar position tdo ak pon dh berubah abis.. kpale kat tpt kaki..kaki kat tpt kpale.. dh terbalik..ak pon xfaham camane bleh jd camtu.. ak jerit pggl mak ak.. die xdgr.. ye ar sume tdo lg rasenye..
last2 ak xtau nk buat ape.. ak text aidid.
>>>>>>>>>texting
me: did ak xtau nk bitau sape n buat ape. tangan ak saket gle babi ble ak bangun ni. xbleh tahan doe.

pas text ak tetido blk.. bgn kol 10pg je mak ak kejut n ak bitau die pasal tangan ak ni.. mmg xsangke sesangat saket... so mak ak amik ubat urutkan.. menjeri2 gak lah ak kesakitan.. ye konvo lg 3 jam je kot..

orite.. disebabkan kesakitan tangan ak tu ak sampai lambat.. berlari2 kot ak satu menare uitm tu cr tpt nk que ngn xpakai jubah lg.. ape sume.. mmg lost.. ngn tangan saket sume.. at last yeah ak nmpk budak2 lain tgh lalu red carpet.. so ak gi blakang cpt2 pakai jubah nk masok que.. tp last2 ak lupe pakai topi die.. pegawai yg jage pggl ..

"mane topi awak. pakai cpt. jap2 rambut awk ni panjang sgt. jom ikot saye"

so ak pon ikot la.. last korg tau tak die bwk ak nk gunting rambut ak.. die ckp langgar protokol rambut panjang.. ak plak plik ak rase rambut ak ok je kot.. pakai topi kemaslah.. tp atlast die potong rambut ak jugak... mmg pasrah je lah.. dlm hati babi btol!!! hari yg malang.. hoho. sabar je..

dah la ak sampai lewat mmg sit ak kat blakang skali.. pastu dgn video psl uitm die pasang repeat byk kali boring nk mati.. ak lapa+sangap nk rokok+haus+boring+bengang kot sume ade..nasib baik bleh main mesej..haha. time2 camni ak rajin mesej org.. bdak degree dlu naik pentas.. dh la ramai gle bdak deg.. ble bdak dip punye turn lege gle... yes nk abis dh.. haha. naik pentas amik simbolik skrol. cao tron. xde ape pon sgt..

so berakhirlah kisah konvo yg sgt memenatkan dan malang sket. ramai member ak konvo sidang esk... so ak cam alone gak la time konvo nk tangkap pic pon xde mood ngn keadaan ak cam2.. so ak ajak mak ak tros blk..




to all my classmates congratulation to all of you. wish u the best in future!!!

xoxo
-cyfulnizam-